Genocide: Warfare for the Cheap at Heart

Ahh.... genocide. Some view it as a crime, others view it as inherently evil. I see it as warfare for those who prefer Wal-Mart to Lacoste. Think about it. The only reason why you're here alive today is BECAUSE of genocide.

Who did your ancestors have to kill in order for them to procreate and make a dozen little you's? You want a European example. Simple. Ever hear the Avars? No? Well... no wonder. As I mentioned in the last blog I put up, a lot of Turkic peoples migrated when the Turks conquered the Juan-Juan. The Avars are one of them. When Rome was being put out by Germanic tribes, they came and settled on the Hungarian plain. Things were rosy for these people back then. Killing, raping, pillaging, drinking yogurt and talking about the best way to make sure your composite bow is steady as you ready your killing shot. A good steppe life. Then, Charlemagne came along. He smashed and smashed and crushed the Avars till there was no more Avars. Then the Magyars (modern day Hungarians) took their spot. If you're a European reading this, why bother? This was centuries ago.... well not really. This shit is happening now in Africa.

Yes, because you guys put on average 20 different ethnic groups in one country. Genocide is whats going on now. Instead of letting the big African ethnic groups (Fulani, Zulu, Yoruba, Oromo, Swahili speakers etc etc etc) swallow up or kill all the small ones. Now, the small ones HAVE to get wiped out to get access to little materials a typican African nation needs. All this village burning, limb-dismembering reminds me of what medieval Europe went through. Modern day Africa is really medieval Europe. With a lot of growing pains. A genocide you maybe familiar with is the Rwandan one. Just an attempt for the Hutus to stake out a tribal claim in Central Africa. Which is not easy. The dense jungle areas of that region mean generally less food and less healthy people. Meaning smaller ethnic groups. So when the two biggest groups in Central Africa rumbles, everyone's gonna get messed up. Real bad. After the Tutsis fought back, the Hutus fled to the DRC. Making even more tribal enemies. As I said, in Africa its all about staking out a territory for yourself, but the hard part is keeping it.

Anyways Europe is lucky in that respect. The French live in France. The Germans in Germany. This is the new 'norm'. Wasn't the norm 100 years ago during the time of European Empires. The exceptions are the United Kingdom of G.B. and Spain, which could split apart into tribal territories at any time. If Europe is lucky, the New World for the most part is luckier. Ever hear what happened to the Iroquois peoples?

The biggest, baddest tribe north of the Rio Grande, besides the Sioux after they got horses. The point is, they controlled the Great Lakes region through trade and their large forts. They were smart too. They use guns bought from the Dutch to wipe out an ally to their Great Enemy, the French. That ally was the Huron. Diseases decimated both tribes but the Iroquois had guns and shot and clubbed the Huron to near extinction. Then the Iroquois took the survivors to fill up their tribal ranks. A tribe after my own heart. During this period of the time they allied with the UK. Maybe this was smart when they had to deal with the French. But during the American Revolutionary War, this wasn't a good strategy. Washington sent brigades north to destroy every Iroquois settlement in their homeland of Northern New York state. Now, Iroquois have to live on old Huron land. Figures huh?

If you live in the Americas, where would you be living? Essex, Wessex, Sussex... or worse. Northumbria! Face it man. Genocide is cheap and it gets the job one. You need a modern example? In 100 years, how many Uighurs or Tibetans will there be. Maybe all the Uighurs in the world will live in Turkmenistan and all the remaining Tibetans will live in India? Who knows. Thats genocide for you. You Europeans though, you think its terrible. Wait till the Basques actually grow the balls to declare their own state, or Scotland seperates. Then you'll know how every 3rd World Country feels. If you're a 3rd world country, and you need the space. Get it done. After all, the country which are the richest are the most ethnically and culturally homogenous. Look at Japan, Scandinavia!

Ahh.. genocide. Cheapest warfare there is, and it'll never end.

Manzikert: Why You Have to Thank the Nearest Turk for Why Things Are The Way They Are

I like history and warfare. I'm not going to lie. I relish the rich stories it gives out about human beings. Like me and probably you too, who posess the same qualities except they're able to use them better than us. These days a really athletic person might as well play football or basketball. 1000 years ago, a really athletic person was probably some type of warrior. Trust me, there were alot of them back then and the coolest society to be a warrior would have to be one of those steppe ones.

Ever since these people had figured out how to corral a horse and ride it they've been kicking ass. Serious ass. The earliest one were the Indo-Europeans. Don't sound familiar? Well, they pretty much wiped out any Y-Chromosome Neolithic farmer genes that could've existed within you and replaced them with interesting Indo-European ones. Which is probably why most Europeans speak an Indo-European language. These people didn't stop there. Europe was lucky, to be totally honest with you. The really crazy ones like the Persians and the Aryans went to Iran and South Asia. These cow-obsessed, Soma drinking, drug addicts racists conquered most of Northern India leaving the Dravidian peoples to keep the Southern areas. Even they weren't the craziest of them all. The Scythians drank human blood and smoked hemp after taking a rest from driving around their buggy carts and killing Greeks and Slavs.

Then the Turco-Mongol peoples got at it and the fun fun times began. The Chinese, thinking that they could weaken some Northern Barbarian tribes (the Juan Juan Empire) gave a bit more powerful to a smaller tribe near lake Baikal named the Tu-Chueh. They conquered the Juan Juan and formed a massive empire mostly by cultural assimiliation which isn't hard in Central Asia. Its that or death. Soon everybody was a Tu-Chueh or Turk. Bands of Turks split off on their own like the Bulgars, Khazars and Pechenegs to find their own fortunes elsewhere. You'd think that the Turks would invade China next but they didn't. Sadly, they broke up into 2 states.

This ain't the end of the story. After the Arabs using Islam conquered a huge Empire they began raiding Turkish lands near the Oxus and Jaxartes rivers and soon their was Turks in Baghdad. Capital of the Abbasid Caliphate. The Turks began chewing out Caliphs as soon as they chose the new ones to replace them. More and more Turks began moving West as the Abbasids began to collapse. Many working for Persian warlords and soon they converted to Islam. The toughest bunch of these people were a tribe called the Seljuks.

After getting pissed at a Persian lord he took his whole tribe (horses and goats included) and began ransacking the Middle East soon even becoming Sultan of the decaying Islamic Empire and their new leader Alp Arslan began raiding Christian Armenia razing entire cities to the ground.

Now, its 1071. The neighbouring Byzantine Empire is nervous. They've been having to deal with Bulgars and now these Seljuk Turks show up in their home turf (Anatolia or Modern Day Turkey). A Byzantine Empress marries a general by the name of Romanus thinking that this military man can end this Turkish threat. He then kitted out an army of Byzantine Greeks, Franks, Norsemen even some Turks himself to face these 'heathens'. Needless to say, he got pwned.

The Seljuks used my Steppe tactic. They basically fired arrows from their horses and when that massive Byzantine field army advanced, they'd retreat. When the Byzantines got tired, they'd come close to fire arrows again and when the field army advanced, they retreated. This carried on for hours until the Byzantine army turned around. BIG MISTAKE. The Seljuks pounced on their tired foes whose reserve forces had already ran back to Constantinople. They even took Emperor Romanus prisoner.

What happens next is really funny. Romanus is sitting in a tent, probably waiting to be killed by Alp Arslan (Seljuk Chieftain) when Alp lets him go. The Byzantines weren't the real target. He was more interested in killing Shi'ites in Egypt than Greeks with a pseudo-Roman complex.He hammered out an armistice with Romanus. Romanus went home and got the typical Byzantine treatment. He got his eyes gouged (ceremonial practise for really bad Emperors of the Byzantines) and he died a few days later. Alp was also killed by a servant a too a month after that. Their armistice collapse and now Turkish tribes (with their goats) were now taking land that had been speaking Greek for the past.... 1,400 years.

WHAT IS THE SIGNIFICANCE OF THIS???: The Muslim Seljuk invasions of the Byzantine Empire made the new Byzantine Emperors reconcile with the Roman Catholic Church. They joined forces to have a Crusade to free Byzantine lands (and with back Jerusalem). The crusades started the revival of Europe since Greek knowledge translated to Arabic and Chinese technology all came back to Europe allowing it to revitalize by the 14th century before the Black Death. However the crusades and the Turkish invasions ruined the Byzantine forever. All this culminated in the Renaissance. Then the discovery of the New World since Europeans were forced now to avoid Muslim trade routes to the Orient thus discussing the New World.

So, if you live in North America. Find the nearest Turk in your community and thank him and his ancestors. For killing Chinese, Persians, Arabs, Shi'ites, Armenians and Byzantine Greeks to live in North America.

2008: The Year the British Empire Blows Up

* Taken from an earlier article I'd written

I want you to go any international news website and pick out the troublesome nations. Nations like Burma, Zimbabwe, Iraq, Pakistan, Palestine and Israel and you'll notice one thing. They're all former members of the British Empire.

Blaming the British Empire for everything going wrong in the world isn't a cheap shot. Its reality. The Chinese still hates the UK over the Opium Wars in the mid 19th century and the Aussies still resent the Brits for their low population*. Another good reason for blaming the Brits for everything is simply because it's all too easy.

For instance, Zimbabwe. Slam two major ethnic groups together (Shona and Ndebele) plus whites from Devonshire who can't quite belong and are also very trigger happy and you get a messed up nation. Taking cues from South African neighbours, a sort of apartheid developed there and of course a black rebellion started across Southern Africa. Robert Mugabe who strained under white, colonial rule got power in the end and went mad. Everywhere he saw the treacherous Anglos pinning to get White Rhodesia back. A Briton might say "Wot do I got to do with it mate?". Everything of course. Your nation caused Zimbabwe. It made the pseudo-nation itself built on the whites. When Mugabe chases the whites out, his Zimbabwe falls. Fitting I suppose. Playing favourite to a foreign minority always gets you nowhere. Zimbabwe is now a stumbling state where 1/4 of its citizens now live in South Africa. Bread costs 70,000 dollars due to hyperinflation not seen since 1920s Germany.

Iraq, oh Iraq. Created by the Brits to please their Arab partners who helped chase the Turks out of the Mid-East it was the amalgamation of Arab Tribes both Shi'a and Sunni plus Turcomans, Assyrians and Kurds ruled by Saudis. When Iraq rebelled in 1941, Churchill gassed them. When Saddam gassed Kurds, the West and Britain cried foul. "You can't do what we did! It's not just!"Well, it's not just if you're nation is on the world second largest oil supply. Churchill died peacefully in 1965 at the age of 90. Saddam was hung by a Shi'a gang last year. Iraq is now a bloody mess teetering on Iranian domination.

The list goes on! Pakistan's North West Frontier is overrun with Pashtuns not seen since the British Empire. Burma's military government only exists because the British didn't want another fight immediately after World War II, yet it fought in Malaya against ethnic Chinese who're now persecuted by the Malaysian government. Nigeria is mess with Christians and Muslims slaughtering each other over oil, Britain's Palestinian problem is now America's War on Terror, Kenyans tried to kill each other because there's around 40 ethnic groups in their country compared to Britain's 3 or 4. Britain crushed Iran's only Democratic govt which led to the overthrow of Mossadeq, to the Shah's reign and now the Ayatollahs. Britain's defeat of the Boer Republics in Southern Africa gave rise to Apartheid etc etc etc etc

I even scoff when Britain tries to make a case about Tibet. Francis Younghusband led Gurkha and Sikh troops to conquer Tibet for no goddamn reason. After all, there's no monetary value in that backward region of Himalayas. He killed thousands. When the Chinese invaded, they treated the surrendered Tibetans with respect. When Tibetans surrendered to Younghusband, he being the crazy 19th Century Anglo he is massacred them. I even scoff at Tibetans, they once had an Empire! They conquered the Chinese capital Chang'an around the 7th century. They even ruled the Bay of Bengal for a while.

They have no right to complain. Who even knows how many ethnic groups the British killed in the Australia, the Americas and Africa. I'm pretty sure Reagan's Evil Empire was the British Empire, even though Thatcher's toothy smile concealed it.Let's hope Britain does continue this bloody tradition. A war in Iran seems certain and a rematch to the Anglo-Persian wars would be a good one. Or another Falkland War would warm my colonial heart. Boer War redux anyone?

God Save the Queen! -clink-